Wednesday, June 28, 2017

For Those Who've Been Wondering

Some have asked the question, "How does your anxiety manifest itself?"

For me it is an uneasy feeling of foreboding, sometimes it's when I wake in the middle of the night. But mostly I wake each morning with an uncomfortable pit in my gut, a nervous flutter. I try to ignore it, but like cobwebs, it sticks, until my morning rituals shake it off.

I don't stop what I'm doing, but my nervous Nelly-self makes "doing" a heavy task. When my anxiety becomes unmanageable, leaping into panic, I can barely put an outfit together and I completely lose the ability to accessorize.

My mother-in-law once confided she had a friend who could only make right turns when she drove. I wonder, did her right-turn-friend suffer from anxiety? I drive in the right lane, prefer seats on the aisle, please, because you never know when you might need to make a hasty escape.

It would be nice to be able to go anywhere and do anything, without a plan of attack. But, the eternal optimist in me makes me believe, deep down, with a little work, this too shall pass.

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